So the title of my blog is 30 x 30, because the point was to lose thirty pounds by the time I turned thirty...April 20. I'm not going to make it. It's kinda sad, it was a totally reasonable goal at the time I made it. Now I've only lost about five pounds since then. So, yeah. Not gonna make it with less than a month.
Maybe I should change it. 30 x 31??? Doesn't have quite the same ring to it. I've been struggling again with my eating and not doing the BDS, even though I still think it's a great way to go. I don't know what to say about my inability to keep it central in my mind. It's like I have a switch in my brain that I just turn off when I want to eat some ridiculous food...need to find, kill the switch. Break it so that I always remember every frickin' thing that goes in my mouth.
I don't think I'll change the name of the blog...it's not really read by anyone except for me, so what's the point? But I will say that I want to get back on track and lose another five pounds before my birthday...go me!
19 March 2009
11 March 2009
Dieting vs. Working Out
Is one always easier than the other? For me, dieting is one long-ass struggle against my inner glutton. I will probably never be the type of person who sits down to a meal of grilled chicken and steamed vegetables and says, "yum." I will be the one who is thinking about the possible procurement of ice cream. Which makes it hard when I tell myself "no."
Working out, being active on the other hand is like a gift. A shiny, mind-calming gift I allow myself to open. I like feeling strong. I like pushing myself and breathing heavily. Last night I went swimming for the first time in a while. I totally relished the feeling of shooting off the wall after a turn, cutting through the water and feeling the quivering in my arms after a sprint lap. I am not a particularly fast swimmer, but I am a good one. I love the way the water holds me up. It's such a huge difference from the way I feel when I'm walking or running, fighting gravity and wishing for smaller boobs.
So how can I merge the two? How can I get the same feeling from eating healthily for a day or a week? And how do I sustain the feeling?
Working out, being active on the other hand is like a gift. A shiny, mind-calming gift I allow myself to open. I like feeling strong. I like pushing myself and breathing heavily. Last night I went swimming for the first time in a while. I totally relished the feeling of shooting off the wall after a turn, cutting through the water and feeling the quivering in my arms after a sprint lap. I am not a particularly fast swimmer, but I am a good one. I love the way the water holds me up. It's such a huge difference from the way I feel when I'm walking or running, fighting gravity and wishing for smaller boobs.
So how can I merge the two? How can I get the same feeling from eating healthily for a day or a week? And how do I sustain the feeling?
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